Your Competent Child: Toward A New Paradigm In Parenting And Education

I have the earlier edition and it is the best book I have read on parenting. It quickly reveals the false choice most people assume we have as parents as either permissive or authoritarian and shows a 3rd way based on respect. It is so obvious and simple but, with legacy habits in our heads from our own childhoods, can be hard to get used to. But it is so worth it when you see the effect on your kids as they bounce forward in their own self-confidence and self-autonomy. If you only read one book on being a parent, I recommend this.

There are so many books circulating about parenting though actually you don't really need them. I can only highly recommend this book as its message is so refreshing and common sense and and also simple: what parents and children need is respect and warmth for each other.Listen to children and take them seriously as little personalities is the key for a happy child and happy parents. Jeper Juul draws a brilliant and very useful picture between past and present of educational approaches which are easy to understand and convincing. I can also highly recommend his other books!

Reading this book really answers to lot of questions and uncertainties for the parents of the 21 century.I really liked the idea of reversed education, I 've felt many times that kids are so intuitional about the parents' struggles. I think I will listen more and will try to forget some of the conventions I've been used to and experiment more!

The book every parent needs to read

Interesting book that reveals a lot about a certain approach towards parenting. However, most of the examples are from extreme situation with violent behaviors from parents or difficult history (incest...). Moreover the author as built up his theories in reaction to parenting traditions inherited from the 1960's or before. So I think it is useful to learn from his approach but balance it with other contemporary authors.

product arrived as described. it was a quick delivery.

This is the only Jesper Juul book I can find in English and I am so impressed. I wish some of his other books were available in English (The Competent Family). Its changed the way I think about the "parent child relationship" and has stopped me being so 'controlling' of my children. Yet the paradox is I have more of a leadership role within the family. Overall its an incredibly positive book and really helpful with teenagers. However, it is very challenging because its really about changing a very well established parenting paradigm (i.e. parent as authoritarian) and aims to make our relationships with our children more authentic; more rewarding; more equal. This will be very much more difficult for parents who dont want to lose the short term advantages of 'power-over' their children. I found lots of evidence (via the websites in other European countries called Familylab) for the approach and lots of examples of families using the approach. I believe it provides a robust parenting model for the future. The philosophy in this book ties in well with those I have read from the school of Non-Violent Communication (NVC) such as Respectful Parents, Respectful Kids by Sura Hart and Victoria Kindle Hodson (suitable for younger children). However, Jesper Juul goes further than "needs" and explains how to express your "wants" and how to use personal language in family life. If you are willing to put aside old parenting models and want to learn a liberating long-term way of relating to your children that will build self esteem and competence, I highly recommend this book.

The spelling and editing is an absolute disgrace. It distracts from a rather interesting perspective. It is incomprehensible how such a poorly produced book is being sold.