The Twisted Ones

Things I did after reading this book:1. Gathered all the plastic shopping bags up and put them in the car to recycle2. Threw out the broken toaster3. Ordered a motion-sensitive light for the back of the house4. Talked myself out of putting the mattress over the window5. Moved the deer skull to the back of the linen closet, behind the winter comforter (don't judge; it was a gift from a friend)6. Turned on all the lights before I went to bedThis book is the sort of horror that slides under your skin with its sheer mundanity, until you're over the threshold of oddity, into unsettling creepiness and then life-threatening peril. Kingfisher's writing manages to be both clear and straightforward and also a tool that reveals character and establishes a sense of place without apparent effort. And the dog lives.

Okay, so this will be spoiler-free.T. Kingfisher (aka Ursula Vernon, but for grown-ups) is one of my favorite authors of all time (who is still alive, thankfully). I don't really "do" horror novels too terribly often. This one? I will revisit this again and again and again and again until I can't sleep anymore. I doubt I could fall asleep reading this if I tried!It's suspenseful, it's otherworldly, it's absolutely terrifying. Above all, however, it is intensely, unshakably human. The narrator is literally an ordinary woman doing ordinary things, her life is completely banal up until the events of the story happen. And throughout the terror of what takes place, she is still really really normal. It's amazing because I honestly don't think the story would have worked without a narrator who is so much of an ordinary person that I can see myself asking to borrow some sugar for cookies, which I then share with her.Kingfisher/Vernon's writing voice lends itself surprisingly well to horror. She is normally tongue-in-cheek, humorous, and quite practical, and in the face of eldritch horrors, this becomes a sharp contrast between what is happening and how it is being presented, which blends together into an eerie, unsettling urge to go outside into the woods. (I wouldn't do that if I were you!)Another fantastic read from an equally fantastic author!

Wow. I think the moral of this story is, if someone asks you to clean out the house of a deceased relative, say no and keep your peace of mind.Mouse, unfortunately for her, does not say no. Her father asks for so little, so when he asked Mouse to clean out his mother's house, she agrees, even though it is commonly agreed that the old lady was meaner than a pit of agitated rattlesnakes. Then to find Granny was a hoarder - even if there had been no fantasy element in this book, that alone would make it a horror novel.With just her beloved coonhound for company, Mouse sets to work. Creepy things happen. She makes friends with the suspected hippies across the street. More creepy things happen, but as long as Bongo, her hound is okay, she'll be okay.What I like most about Kingfisher's novels is her authorial voice. No matter what she throws at me in the way of plot or setting or secondary characters, I believe her because her POV character is always so grounded and down-to-earth. Her narrators are so real that I will follow her anywhere. (Okay, she's on my list of authors whom I buy all their books.)In her afterword, she mentions the inspiration for this, Arthur Machen's "The White People." I was not familiar with either Machen or this story, but it didn't matter. (I am familiar with H.P. Lovecraft and his views, so I chuckled at her "Well, Lovecraft, bless his heart (that is a *Southern* bless his heart....)" Oh, yes, the substitution of "bless his heart" for the curse word you actually have in mind.)So, it's October. Want to read something spooky? Try this!

This is one hell of a creepshow. The author is well known for her writing of realistic characters and her own hound is brought to (flatulent) life in the pages. It does start slow but naturally, building tension gradually until the frickinfrackin window scene. Trust me. This book is delightfully creepy and I may never trust anything deer-shaped ever again.Or woodpeckers in the woods.Clak clak.

I did very much enjoy this book. It was atmospheric, perfectly paced and humorous.I believe this was my first ever folk horror read, although I didn’t much care for the centre plot of the story so to speak. However, I did throughly enjoy the book. Straight away from the synopsis I got MPHFP vibes. Step-grandfathers journal and a series of horrible terrors. I found the characters very strong and likeable. It really brings back that old fashioned neighbourhood spirit. I thoroughly enjoyed the writing and found it so humorous at times.Back the issues I had with the plot. What I liked was a unique twist, normally it would be a teen and her family, not perhaps a young women on her own. This did add a good perspective to the story. Before you found out what the mystery was the author definitely kept you guessing, planting different theories through the narration. It was such a huge premise and build up that I struggled with the idea that revealing the big mystery would perhaps ruin the book but this wasn’t entirely the case, For me even when the mystery was revealed it fell short for me and I didn’t much care for it. The way it was delivered was good but I didn’t like the idea. It was just missing something.For me there are so many loose ends and things weren’t really explained enough to help understand what was going on. I feel like the book should of been been longer.In short I very much enjoyed the story but it was the centre of the plot and idea I didn’t much care for. It wasn’t what I was expecting. From the quote on the cover I guess I was expecting something more demonic & paranormal. I find it so hard to explain 😅 but was a good read.

This book was interesting from the very first page all the way to the very last. The main character, as narrator, was believable and just like someone you've known in your life. I found myself wanting to make time to read this and never got bored with it. Just the kind of book I love, unusual but strangely realistic too.

This is a cosmic horror book where a lot of the horror comes from the utter alieness of the terror contrasted from the mundane details of normal life. This means a lot of the terror comes from the things that aren't explained and the implications that creep in. This felt very real. The sort of story, well, the sort of characters that feel like real people. Bongo is very definitely written by someone who has had beloved hounds and loves them with a clear-eyed understanding of what they are.It does make this unique, most of the traditional cosmic horror tend to be narrated by characters who don't feel like real people. Lovecraft's ...well, even calling them 'protagonists' is giving them too much credit, they're barely even plot devices. Most of the traditional cosmic horror writers were bad at characterization. It made it easier to ignore the actual impact of the horror.Cosmic horror doesn't usually scare me. This came a lot closer than I expected it to.

First off, why write under a ridiculous pen-name, and than give the game away within the book? Never mind.The main character, "Mouse", is quite likeable, with a lot of wry humour to share, and really she is what saves the story from being a mediocre horror tale. The main premise, of a horrific fairy-type realm, seemingly inhabited by lots of animated bones, "just around the corner", is OK as it goes, but it is just put there on a take it or leave it basis, with no explanatory backstory. The author's declared aim of using a fragmentary second hand account of the hidden realm to provide background detail because it would be more realistic, really didn't work for me, and I found it mildly frustrating. Not saying this is a bad story, I did finish it, but it could have been so much better.

There is really very little that happens until the last 10th of this novel with the vast amount of it being twee characters behaving tweelly.Ursulas stories have in the past been a tad uneventful for me but were saved by great characters...unfortunately that doesn’t apply here. Book seems largely chats, whiskey, tuna sandwiches and coffee with a chase sequence at the end.