The Flipside of Feminism: What Conservative Women Know -- and Men Can't Say

I am a 37 years old liberal man. I came from a culture that values marriage and the formation of family as the sort of partnership. I am also an advocate of equality and have done extensive work in Silicon Valley which is notorious for its toxic corporate culture and the kind of drama happens with women at work. But rationally speaking, I am able to separate the two concerns, something that most feminists confuse to dissect by the kind of feminist rhetoric that c-suite executives like Sheryl Sandberg and Ellen Pao vouch for. My heart has always been with all those women who have been hurt and abused, but that is also a separate concern. I have experienced the hookup culture and as a man was never fulfilled. I asked a lot of questions from feminist friends of mine, but I noticed a sense of dogma amongst them. They often confuse the employment rights, and voting rights which were the original purposes of feminist movement with social liberation. I have explored the lives of all of the women I have been with in depth. We all had a deep connection. I have also read almost half of the citations in this book beforehand and am very knowledgeable about different branches of feminism and its history. The truth I have found is that something about all those liberated women irks themselves. They are not happy. I did a tally of over 136 families and relationships that I know to cross reference the views described in this book. It checks out. A lot of divorce and separation has been happening amongst my liberated friends, and they are all in turmoil. I didn’t get married till now, because I have had no confidence on what is the right thing to do, but I can tell you this. The few encounters I had with liberal feminists were not satisfying. I didn’t feel my hard work, strengths and values were appreciated. I have worked really hard my entire life in hopes of creating a happy family that I never had. And guess what, my own family and several other families whom I know, were tarnished due to some feminist influence supplying women with some sort of escape goat. At work, we work hard to promote team building, foster connections, remove competition and unite people toward a common goal. However, feminism has not provided a framework for that, and the messaging has gone so confusing for women that they simply don’t know what to do. They hurt themselves over and over again. Feminism has created a social war, and argues with issues that are not measurable. We are losing our framework of raising happy families and children. I for one, can say that I was not happy being brought up without my parents together. Neither the children of those families whom I know lost it due to feministic liberation. But I do think that there is a better way. I have studied ecofeminism, and I think that might be a better approach. At least it tunes in with the true nature of women, another thing which neofeminist and liberal feminists disagree. They don’t want to admit their movement has created unresolved problems in society. The divorce rate since the 70s is up 35% and the women are the ones who initiate it without any good reason, but to say they are not happy. As a child who was hurt my heart is with all those who feel the same. I want a happy family and upbringing for everyone. I want equal rights for everyone. I don’t like racism and homophobia either, but please read this book. I don’t associate anything to politics, so I don’t judge if this book is far right or not, but even if it sounds far right to you, can we think about the arguments it makes and really put some critical thinking behind it? I think this book has laid out the negative impact of feminism to a great extent and all the research and citations are scholarly and are done by credible folks who actually know what they are talking about and who have been working hard doing therapy for decades among families. I am going back to my root on this topic. I don’t want another unfulfilling relationship. And this book lays it out clearly what women should do to create a fulfilling relationship.I don’t believe in God, but may the powers of the universe be upon you and thank you the authors for your work.

Other reviews hit the nail on the head in terms of what is discussed in this book. I'll just give a background on where I come from. My parents were staunch Republicans and I turned out to be the hippy hard core vegan liberal daughter who emulated the 60's peace movements in the 1990's and fought for co-ops and animal right and women's right in my young teen years. I was this way for over a decade. When I hit the age of 30, something felt not quite right.Even though I was hard core liberal, I was honestly against abortion the entire time. I fought in the name of women's right to have an abortion, but yet felt it was wrong. After I graduated college and started teaching in the public school, I knew something was going on, and it wasn't right. I taught in a Midwestern inner city school where the majority of my students were on both the free breakfast and lunch programs, most didn't know if their homes would have running water that night, or where they would be sleeping. In one class alone, 22 out of 35 kids lived with their mom only. A few knew who their dads were. Quite a number had siblings sired by different fathers and the mom still by herself. These kids, living in poverty, although may have seemed dumb to the outside world, were very very smart. They had to be to survive. They didn't like that they didn't know or have a male figure in their lives. What their mom's called 'a woman's right to have a baby without a father present' only brought sadness on their kids. They wanted to have a dad or adult male figure present in their lives. They didn't want a slew of mom's 'boyfriends' coming over. Several kids joked that their 'mom is a ho'. To them their mom's feminist lifestyle (as the moms would put it) was not seen that way by their kids.This was the first time my liberal world was shattered. I was still a hard core liberal, but the shell was beginning to crack.I begin to wonder why feminist groups were so hard for pushing and pushing 'womens rights' in the form of abortions and the pill. Although this is still being debated, even to this day, I wondered why feminists weren't pushing for health right to HAVE a baby instead of trying to either get rid of a pregnancy or not even have one. Women are biologically meant to have children. I understand there are times when birth control is needed and effective in it's job. Long term relationships, maybe you have PCOS and need the BCP to regulate your hormones, I understand that.Then I hit 30. A few more things shattered in in the liberal shell I had going. I quit being vegan and vegetarian all together. This was due to an iron count so low I was about to go anemic. No amount of prescription iron pills were helping. Although the GP applauded my vegetarian/vegan lifestyle, he said it's not for every body type.I also took a job overseas and saw how universal health care works in other countries, I also saw how other cultures around the world value a mother at home, or not necessarily home ALL the time, but a good family structure. I started to listen to my older relatives how communication is important in relationship and today's women are all about 'gimme gimme gimme' in the relationships but unwilling to give back in return. I looked at how my friend's relationships would crumble because the women wanted to run the relationship in total, no exceptions made. At work I ran into a slew of older, unmarried women without children who made their jobs their careers and how miserable they were. Many realized too late that they wish they put a relationship and a family first, but now in their late 40's/early 50's it was too late for them. Many regretted it, even those that were hard core feminists. They knew they would spend their retirement years alone and wish they had children.I made the change completely from hard core liberal to conservative AFTER I met my husband. At this point I was 'getting up in years' even though I was in my 30's. I knew I wanted children at this time, something I was against when I was younger. I admit I had a hard time making the change because the feminist agenda pushes women NOT to accept being a wife and mother. The Flipside of Feminism: What Conservative Women Know -- and Men Can't Say  basically brings home what I felt at that point. I realized what the feminist agenda was at that time, how it hurt me in my past relationships, and what it is doing today. Yes, I'm a mom that works because I need to and my child needs the social integration and structure at the specialist school we're sending him too. I hate having my kids in daycare during the day. I feel guilt even though all the feminists around me at work tell it it's okay. I get more satisfaction staying at home with my kids than I do at work. And yes, we plan on having more kids, at which point I will stay home (I make a bit more than the daycare costs right now).This book sums up practically everything I've felt about the evolution of feminism. It WAS good and served a purpose back in the day, but now it has morphed into a horrible horrible monster that pushes a destructive agenda that not only hurts women, but uses children as battlefield fodder and treats men like a dog going to an animal shelter.

A defence from feminist indoctrination

This is a nice easy read, albeit I have not completed it yet, as I am also reading other material. Arrived in time and in good order.

An education, so a worthwhile read. Full of thought-provoking arguments, without padding, and well written. A well deserved five stars.

great book

I bought this hoping I was not wasting my money and it has shocked me.I wish I read this book when I was 16. I can't recommend it highly enough.I read a lot and few books are better written, more insightful or more relevant to understanding our culture.Obviously this is a controversial subject so the writer's prose is even more elegant considering the turbulent subject material.This book has dramatically changed my life. I am no longer the same, I understand our culture, myself, men and women like I did not before.