A Smart Girl's Guide: Liking Herself: Even on the Bad Days (American Girl) Kindle Edition

I bought this book as a gift, but never gave it because I found I disagree with some of its central messages, which equate healthy self esteem with being sure you fit in with the crowd and always have at least a few friends around you. The authors confuse being an introvert or a rugged individual with having low self esteem - a big mistake!For example, the first quiz in the book asks girls what they would do if they had no plans for the weekend - the options include inviting the new girl from school over, calling for your neighbor, or just hanging out alone. All three sound okay to me, but here, the choice of hanging out alone is equated by the author of the book with "low self esteem."Really? Well, here's an idea, maybe it could be fun to hang out alone. Maybe you could craft, or clean your room, or hang out with your family, or catch up on TV, or practice your hook shot, or do any one of about a million worthwhile things - why on earth is that low self esteem? I thought maybe it was an isolated stupid question, but in the very same quiz, readers are asked, what are you thinking as you head toward the cafeteria? Are you, (a) hoping someone will sit with you so you don't have to eat alone? (b) wishing you could sit at a more crowded table instead of with just one friend? or (c) looking forward to hanging out with your all of your amazing friends. In this case, not great choices, but sitting alone sounds okay, so does sitting with one friend and so does sitting with a group of friends but here, the idea of sitting alone (a) is equated by the author with "low self esteem."Why? Maybe the girl in question wants to sit alone b/c she is hoping to read the next chapter in the awesome book she's working her way through. Maybe she just likes to sit alone because it gives her time to think. Or draw. Or daydream. Or work on the guest list for her upcoming birthday party. Or write a letter to a pen pal. Or get her homework done so she's free after school...I won't go through every example from the book, but I found many more - the overall message is fit in or die.Another problem I have with this book is the labeling it encourages. For example, they have a quiz about what kind of girl you find "cool" - turns out she is either "popular," "sporty," "smart," or "artsy."Seriously? Are girls that easy to stereotype? Do we really need to limit the girls in our life by labeling them as this or that? Can't you be both athletic and intelligent? Can't an artsy kid also enjoy sports?Overall, the authors really missed the boat here. I wish they had taken the perspective that healthy self esteem can manifest itself in many ways - including solitude and individuality! As it is, this book is a no-go for us.

Returned the book, was not impressed or ok with the overall vibe of the book. Several items within book, particularly within the quizzes, would do the opposite of the stated goal of the book. i.e. How many people you sit with at lunch shouldn't be given as an indicator of whether you have proper self esteem- especially for young impressionable girls. Also whether a person is an introvert (and would rather stay inside instead of going out to play with friends) shouldn't be presented as evidence of something that needs to be fixed. Disappointing for this type of book to contain those type of messages.

So, I ordered this book in spite of the negative reviews and comments about "stereotyping" and forcing girls into a certain category....Here's the thing: even though its 2019 and female empowerment is taking on a whole new meaning, kids still feel a certain way. Middle school is rough. Period. That hasn't changed in the 20 years since I had to endure it, and personally I found the book helpful. I took the quizzes and answered how I thought my 11 year old daughter would, and I didn't find the results offensive or categorizing.I totally get it if people didn't care for the book, but honestly I read it cover to cover and found the subject matter is along the exact lines of what my child is currently experiencing at school. It covers topics such as shyness vs. low self esteem, which I found helpful. Sometimes, kids just need to read about something on their level, rather than from an adult's view point and just process from their level of understanding. I found the best part to be a small blurb on one of the pages titled "help is on the way." It talks about if you (young girl) can't shake negative self - talk and feelings, talk to someone about it. Parents, teachers, psychologists, social workers, school nurse, etc. I found this especially interesting because it says, plain as day, ITS OK TO FEEL THIS WAY AND MENTAL HEALTH IS HEALTHY! Remove the stigma of therapists, and feeling like you HAVE to be happy or else you're "crazy."I recommend this book. My daughter is 11, she is seeing a therapist, and I did not find the print detrimental in any way. It lays out feelings and emotions from a kid's perspective, and offers elementary - middle school aged advice.

This book does the exact opposite of what I had hoped. It introduces the concept of "the cool girl," and "the popular girl." It talks about when a person's hair "looks horrible," and many other judgement based ideas that contribute to low self esteem and insecurity. It's trite and shallow and not a good choice if one is actually trying to help a young person become more empowered and self confident. Recycled it.

This happened to be the second book I bought of this series (or whatever.) My 10 yr old daughter literally did not hardly put it down. She finished it in less then 24 hrs...& NO JOKE=>On a Saturday afternoon into evening-Shockingly! She was actually so pleased with the books, that she came into my room insisting "Mom, you gotta get some more of those book's!"Folk's, these young ladies are growing up in a VERY different time & world when compared to "the times" as well as "the world" we grew up in. Everything's so much faster, so much more stressful & more expectations. Smh. Tooo many damn "influencers" & self proclaimed so called "experts" these days...Anyways, it is SUCH a relief knowing that there are books out here now to help us parents with ALL these countless important situations & topics. I give a solid 5 ☆'s for not only topics but in the tactful & still straight forward manner that didn't frighten or make my daughter feel all uncomfortable at anytime.

Both my 8yr old and 10 yr old have found these books really helpful. There is only so much advice a mom can give before kids start to roll their eyes or glaze over. This book says it better/differently than I do, and so it makes a great "reference" guide for girls who are starting to deal with friendship issues at school. We have several in the series and have been happy with all of them.

Love this book and others in the series. My 9 year old daughter seems to inhale the information and feels empowered by it. Usual girly nonsense at school so this helps her make sense of it all and stay strong. Will be buying the others asap. Thank you!

We have bought 4 books from this series. Great for helping a kid who is having some trouble with kids at school. She can read them in her own time & they have been great.

Bought for my eleven year old who is becoming self- conscious.Thought it was great, with lots of easy to remember tips and written in an empathetic way that a girl around this age can understand and relate to.

A useful book for young girls, my daughter read it and said it was good